Week in Review: Mother in Law Visit: Statue of Liberty

With the government shutdown, Liberty Island is now closed so I was so happy that my first visit to the Statue wasn't put on hold. We were able to visit the island the Friday before the shutdown and kept saying how lucky we were that we didn't plan the visit for the following week. MIL, kids and I had never been to the Statue before, Hubby had gone when he used to live in NYC in his younger years (Before Kendra). My family had gone when I was in the first grade but I refused to miss school to go see the statue, because I was that much of a nerd, even at six. We bought tickets in advance (they were more expensive then I really thought they would be) for 11am time slot but arrived there early and there was no problem getting on the ferry early. We decided to park on the New Jersey side instead of going into NYC, figuring it would make it easier getting home with minimal traffic. That plan would have worked except that we were so hungry when we left that we stopped at the first restaurant we could all agree on and then hit some traffic on the way home, but still ended up getting home early enough to have a normal bedtime. 

We took the ferry over to the island (which I am pretty sure is the only way to get there), they had a bunch of different ferries with names like: Miss Liberty, Miss New Jersey, Miss New York, Miss Ellis Island. We pointed out to the kids where all boats have their names and how each boat has a unique name. Ellis Island is still closed since they are repairing damage from Hurricane Sandy, but as the boat went by, we gave little history recaps on the island and Ellis Island. 

ferry at the dock before we left for the island

The weather was absolutely awesome, I wish I had packed a great lunch because the grounds were perfect for a family lunch. I had only packed some snacks so we wouldn't be starving while we there, but we could have spent another hour there just enjoying the view. I definitely would recommend bringing at least a sweater because the water makes it a little bit more chilly then the mainland, I took my sweater off on the island but I was also carrying around the baby and he is a little hot furnace. We even could have ate at the park from where the ferry left from and where we left the car. There was the old railway station there, built in 1913 that is super creepy but awesomely cool to take some pictures. The trip was awesome, easy to get to and other then the crowds (which you can't avoid at a huge touristy hotspot) and Steven sleeping through the climb to the pedestal, it was a perfect day trip. I was so happy to finally get to see this hugely important monument to our country. 

Renaissance Faire 2013: Boy's Knight Costume

inspiration found here

     Since E's costume is all done and we are just waiting for a final fitting, I have been working on G's costume. We will probably not get to new costumes for Hubby and I this year, Steven and I have many conversations that are much more important than sewing.
     E had wanted her peacock fairy costume, G wanted a knight costume with a red "T" on it. I am assuming that he saw a picture of a Templar Knight, so that it what I used for inspiration. Since I wasn't 100% sure on his size and he isn't around to have fitting sessions with, we made the top of his costume out of old shirts of the Hubby's. A gray one was just cut down and slimmed to fit the smaller body and a white one was trimmed down a little bit with the sides left open to imitate a tunic. It should be nice and light, the weather is supposed to stay warm, while still looking like a costume.

after cutting out the shirt, I cut out 2 identical red cross shapes for the front and back, although
now thinking about it, he probably just needed one on the front. *sigh*

zig zag stitching the crosses onto the shirt in an applique style

playing with my camera effects 

wretched photo that I sent to the Hubbs to show how much I finished while Steve napped

     His pants are proving to be a bit difficult since I have lost the gray fabric that I could've sworn that I had, but if I don't find it tonight, he may just end up wearing black pants and his sneakers. I may also stitch on some armour on the sleeves of the gray shirt. As soon as he gets her on Friday we will doing a full dress rehearsal to ensure it is perfect for Saturday!!!

Attachment Parenting: Independent or Entitled Children, Or is there a happy medium?

what I wake up to every morning

     James and I have been arguing the difference between healthy attachment parenting and Steven just training us to do what he wants through unhealthy attachment. Arguing is probably a strong word, James tells me to let Steven cry for a bit if we know that nothing is wrong and I give him puppy-dog eyes because I hate hearing the baby cry. But he has a point, does self soothing at his age (6 weeks) really help his independence as a growing child and later as an adult?
     James worries that we are creating an adult that cannot survive on their own, that complains until they get their way, an entitled individual that perpetuates the entitled generations that we have now. Children, and adults that do not understand hard work or earning their keep or living within their means or having to wait on something. I understand that, and I have seen children grow up who are like that, but I have seen children who seemed very spoiled grow into very independent, individualist adults as well.
     My thoughts are based purely on my childhood. We were not a family that hugged or touched or coddled. My parents divorced when I was seven and while some siblings grow closer during a divorce, my brother and I just pulled into ourselves. Not to say we were freakish and not socialized or had complete inability to carry on social interactions, but we had (and still have) plenty of issues. Even now, I have the hardest time hugging my parents, it generally feels awkward, the same with hugging my brothers. My grandparents, James and the kids are about the only ones that it isn't too weird. I am a one arm hugger for everyone else, to me that is showing the proper social interaction with little commitment. Because of that and knowing how hard it is even now for me to connect to people, I argue that it is more important at this stage of his life to know that we will always be there, that he can trust us to never leave him and if he needs us that we will come. I figure that independence is achieved in a healthy way by children slowly reaching out to try new things on their own with the complete awareness that a parent will always be there to come back to, if needed. I want the kids to know that he can always come back. When they are learning how to walk or swim or ride a bike, they can go as far as they want, but as soon as it is too much, we will be there. When they are older and start driving or dating, if the situation is too much, that we will be there to talk to and sit with. When they are adults, I will cook them dinner on their birthday, we will help them look for interview clothes or a first house or explain the different settings on a drill (I am still figuring it out). But I definitely think that that trust in your parents is built at this age.
     I wish that there was a way to figure out exactly what style of parenting has the best chance of creating a functional adult out of your child, but each child is different let alone never knowing how each will react. In the end, I will completely agree with James on this point, our job is purely and simply to create happy adults.

This was sent to me on Facebook and it is a perfect thing to share:
Promise to My Daughter by Lisa-Jo Baker
    This absolute pulled on my heart strings. A friend from college (who just announced that baby #2 is on the way) shared this on Facebook and I almost didn't even read it. I am so glad that I did. Even though this is to her daughter, the thought is universal no matter the gender of your child. I loved this so much, I loved how it is almost exactly what I tell Steven. He is just realizing that he can fall, so when we put him down he reaches out really quickly. Every time he does that, I tell him that I will always catch him, no matter what. That I will always be there for him when he thinks he is falling or when he is unsure of himself.

Family Adventures: Lake Minnewaska State Preserve, Lake Minnewaska Trail

beautiful picture bridge

pretty, giant boulders everywhere make for great climbing

     On Hubby's day off this week, we talked about either going to the zoo (which is always my first choice for a day out and about) or to go hiking. Since we are trying to reign in some of our excess spending, we decided that hiking would be the better choice. While we have year memberships to the zoo, the money we end up spending on food (while I do pack lunch, we still end up stopping on the way home to eat again) and gas. We live right in the middle of the Catskills, less then an hour from the Appalachian Trail and in a very rural area so hiking options are pretty limitless. Although that is true, we then had to narrow down our options based on me not being able to do much climbing, toting the newborn around and the two older kids hiking skills. We settled on going to Lake Minnewaska State Preserve in New Paltz, NY, based on a friends recommendation. To be perfectly honest, I have no idea why I never went hiking here after living in this area for 25 years! It was amazing. The park charges $8 for parking and $5 for a map of the trails. The parking was a little crowded but still easy enough to find a spot and the parking lot is where almost all of the trails begin and end. There are port-a-pottys at the parking lot and dispersed through the trails but they are pretty funky so I would avoid them if possible. We all used the facilities before we started and one of our party still had to use the woods. We definitely packed water and some snacks for a halfway break, granola bars, trail mix (carmel cashew from Target, my fav!) and apples. There are a few large, graveled trails all marked really well and we saw lots of bikers using them but the signs also said that horses can use the paths so be careful where you walk.

candid shot that Hubbs was unhappy about

Gorgeous view from the top of the mountain

really creepy bug on a sign

     There are also tons of just hiking paths, all marked but they do not look more then deer paths through the woods, I would not recommend them for hikers with kids...especially a newborn and a recovering mama. The trail that we did was only two miles which shouldn't take too long but we lollygagged and it ended up taking us over three hours. The park is also dog friendly so you meet plenty of dogs hiking the trails too, they must be leashed and there are no trash cans on the property, you should be prepared with trashbags to take anythign with you that you bring into the park. I came prepared with dog clean up bags and a large shopping bag.

view over the lake

      The views were amazing, luckily it was a clear day so we could see really far into the distance. At our usual hiking place, we see some hawks and mostly vultures which we saw here too. As far as wildlife goes, we mostly saw bugs and birds, nothing too scary although E was trying to find a snake. I am assuming that if you get up there early enough then there are deer and maybe fox or coyote. There are two swimming places, one public and one that is a membership area only. The membership section requires a test, all the information can be found here. The public area is small but would be plenty sufficient for us to go swimming, which we definitely plan on as soon as it warms up a bit. It is a mountain lake, so even in high summer, it is chilly. The lifeguards are only there certain times, so if swimming is your goal then check when they will be there before heading out. At the end of the trail (well the beginning too, since it looks in a giant circle) is a pretty grand picnic area that also overlooks the lake. After spending a few more minutes having light saber battles with our acquired hiking sticks, we headed towards home, made a pit stop for dinner and grocery shopping (where I stupidly left all my coupons at home and my reusable shopping bags!).

Lake Minnewaska State Preserve: New York State Website

Potentially terrified by what he is seeing in the mirror

Finally seeing in the mirror

lunch of fresh nectarines with homemade whipped cream the next day!

Thrifting: Books and School Clothes

     I absolutely love thrift shopping. Up until I was pregnant, thrift shopping was a hobby, a place for me to go on dates with friends and grab a couple cute finds, then it was the only logical option with how much I was growing and how picky I am with how things fit. Although in the end, maternity pants (from Salvation Army: Motherhood Maternity brand) and long cut tank tops from Old Navy and Target were the only things that were comfortable. With now three kids, clothes shopping could be an epic expenditure if I bought everything of theirs for retail price. 

My most recent trip to Salvation Army was with my older brother and my niece and Steven so the two or three hours that I used to spend shopping through every item was not an option. With fall coming up, warmer clothes in Eve and Griffin's new sizes is a must. Griffin is in a size 10, but there wasn't much in that size on this trip, but I did find three great Old Navy brand 12s that totaled $6. They will be stored away until a few months (possibly weeks, kids are like that I've learned) and be perfect for Griffin. Eve is a tough little cookie to shop for, she is 8 years old and has a couple older friends, so fashion is starting to become a more important factor in her clothing choices. Gone are the days were green leggings under a Snow White dress with pink cowgirl boots passed as an option. With that in mind, I have been trying to buy a little more generic girl clothes and when she is with me, she can pick out the more radical options. I found two great Children's Place pants, size 8 for length and with the brilliant elastic/button waist cinches to fit her size 6 waist. One hot pink that can button up to capris and the other an emerald green corduroy flare leg. They both fit her nicely and can be paired with almost any of her tops or shoe choices. Overall, that trip was successful. While I didn't get anything for Steven, Hubby or my awkward postpartum body, these five finds made me feel accomplished.

I know that I have posted before about how much I love our library's thrift store, but seriously, I love it so much. I have only been once since Steven has arrived and I was still hurting too much to pay too much attention to the brilliance around me. This will explain the second stack of books from that trip where the only book that I picked up was Crocheting for Dummies, the rest are the Hubby's choices, although I may read the Magic the Gathering books, fantasy books are my favorite genre.
     The trip before that I was much more involved thus my choices: The Good Housekeeping Needlecraft Encyclopedia, Making Dolls and Doll Clothes, Hogwarts Yearbook, two baby books, three Supernatural books (Hubby and I are huge fans), two vintage hardcovers and three young adult novels for my nieces birthday present. Hubbs picked out the two Dilbert books (after five years together, I didn't know that he was such a big fan), a home improvement book for when we finally move into our own first house, and a book on Irish fairy tales.  These two trips cost us around $20, and while I do not have the voracious appetite for reading that I had as a child, I still read too much to warrant always running to Barnes and Nobles when I finish up a book. As much as I would love to, do not get me wrong, I love the bookstore, but I can not justify spending $100 on books like I used to when my grocery budget every week is that much. Twenty dollars once a month or so is plenty to entertain our whole family in the literary department. Do not ask how much we spend on movies every month though, then my frugality ends and Hubby's love of the movie theater takes over. It's fair after I look at my stockpile of fabric, ribbon, patterns and books. Mostly.
     And here is my obligatory baby photo for today. Steven has grown so much already in the three weeks since he was born. He spends much more time awake, laughs in his sleep and fusses when he hears my voice. We co-sleep every night, when I am up to it, we try to put him in his swing to sleep for a couple hours but when he wakes up to nurse he usually stays in bed with me. Last night was the first night that Hubby "forced" me to let Steven cry it out. Every night since he was born, Steven has about an hour of freaking out crying that a diaper change, nursing, swaddling or holding will soothe. So last night, he had to sit in his swing until he relaxed. We both watched him the whole time, for the most part, there was a good chunk of it that I was in full blown tears with my head under a pillow because I couldn't pick him up. But after only five minutes or so, he stopped and Hubby held him for a bit then I nursed him and we all went to bed relatively happy. Hubby thinks that I was ridiculous but I am terrified (completely unfounded terror btw) that if we let him cry that he will have severe trust issues as an adult and will not want us to be a part of his life. James assures me that it will not be the case but I still worry. I keep telling him that Steven is only three weeks old, that he shouldn't have to cry because I am right there all the time. But it would be nice to be able to go to the bathroom without the door open or a baby in my arms, so I see his argument. As I am writing this, he is peacefully laying and practice nursing in his sleep. I can't wait to see his first true smile and hear him laugh but I am already sad that he is starting to lose his baby smell and that he has grown so much, solidifying the fact that he will continue to grow and will one day be too big to hug me in public. *Big sigh* For now, Steven and I have the blessed option of staying snuggled all day together doing anything we want or absolutely nothing.

Family Adventures: Rye Playland

   This past Tuesday, the Hubby had a day off and with the kids home from school for the summer, we try to get out and do something once or twice a week. When I was working, Hubby and I both worked retail and when the kids were in school the chances of days off aligning were slim so we try to take advantage of the opportunities when they arise. He and I chatted the night before about doing something with the day off and the nice weather. Fortunately, having a two week old has yet to stop us from doing anything. The day Baby Steven came home from the hospital, I got stir crazy and we spent two hours at Target that evening. Since we have a year long membership to the Bronx Zoo (even though it is over an hour away and our days off schedule) so we try to go there a few times a year to actually make it worth the cost. Outside of that, the Bronx Zoo is in my top five favorite place to spend the day, so I always vote for it. The five (ahh it's now five!) piled into my little Escape and started driving towards the zoo. As we drive over the Bear Mountain Bridge, we drive into one of the scenic pull offs so I can nurse and the kids can look over the Hudson, while there Hubby throws out the idea of going to Rye Playland instead. While I was not against the idea, I have a small control issue that freaks when plans change like that. In my head I am freaking about not having sunscreen (we never need that at the zoo), no swimsuits, not enough lunch packed, no towels, no changes of clothes, and what was I going to do with Baby! Needless to say, after about half an hour of high blood pressure, I was fine and we were almost to Rye.
     The day turned out wonderful, I practiced nursing in public which is still an awkward event for me, not at all for Steven who likes to make his loudest sounds while under the nursing cover. (to the left: picture of Steven and I in front of the bell tower at the park, highlighting why I shouldn't wear red and that I need to start working on this baby weight) E and G had tons of fun, even James went on most of the rides. There are two pretty neat roller coasters that the kids really enjoyed, while most of the other rides are pretty normal fair fare. We didn't even get to the beach since we didn't arrive at the park until noon and by six or so I was too tired to keep going. From the crowds, I figured that most people spend the day on the beach and then go to the park towards the evening. We had almost no wait on any rides all day, where the kids were the only ones on some of the rides and around five the lines started getting pretty long, not Disney long but too long for us to wait to go on rides that we had already went on at least once.
     Our biggest issues were the kids not wanting to leave by the end of the night and G getting bumped one too many times on the bumper cars and the seat belt leaving a mark on his neck. They went on that ride twice, E was too small to drive alone so James had to ride with her. They seemed to have a good time overall by the end of the visit, well worn out and only a minimal amount of cotton candy was consumed.

The park had a log flume where the rider only gets a tiny bit wet, but they then included this lovely bridge where you can stand after getting off the ride to ensure that you are completely soaked when Momma does not have a change of clothes at all. While that was a worry of mine, James went right on the ride with them and while he initially stood to the side, I think the kids might have talked him into standing right where the most water can soak you. I am sure you can tell which of the over six foot tall figures is my hubbs. Positively, it was warm enough that all three of them were dry by the time we loaded up the car to head home.
     The drive is a little long for us, but if you live closer, I am sure that it is a very convenient play park. I really liked the option of purchasing a "spectator" ticket for me. Since we had the baby, I wouldn't be going on any of the rides, so for half the price the spectator ticket was perfect. The prices for the tickets were really fair considering that it is unlimited rides, all day from 10am until 10pm. They don't let full packed lunches into the park, but you can pack in a cooler and go out to the car and bring the food into their picnic area which is right on a lake that you can also rent paddle boats on. The lines were fair for most of the day but we did go on a weekday so that might have made the difference. Next time, I will definitely plan on going to the beach for part of the day. The park bracelets also let you leave and come back, so I guess you could go to an off-site restaurant to eat lunch or dinner and still come back if you wanted. Over all, my official personal scoring would give the park a 7 out of 10. Distance kind of killed a bit for me and my lack of preparedness might have influenced that score as well. But I would not mind going back and I would recommend it as something in that area to do with kids, at least from age 3 through 14.
     We are starting on redoing three bedrooms in our temporary house so hopefully some before and after pictures will be on their way as well as baby updates, and as soon as I can, sewing and crafts!!!